New Year Resolutions? Or not...

 

 

I belong to a slightly outdated era. That era in which there was no Internet or mobiles until I was up and working for a couple of years.  In that same era, not all books were available all the time as it is now.  I remember when I read about how important it is to actually write resolutions in "The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People" I was impressed.  I remembered those little pieces of paper with scribbled resolutions that get lost, only to be found a year or more later with
most of them actually done.  I took Covey's advice seriously.  I wrote the objectives down in an excel sheet, with milestones and follow up cells.  I even made a big chart with pictures of the things I want...of how I want to my life to look like. 

We usually have dreams and pictures in our heads and hearts...but sometimes they are faded away, others they are so misplaced that one is on top of the other hiding its beauty and its glamor.  Sometimes, they are just fragmented and many that none of them has enough power to speak to us and materialize in the real world.  (if we assume that the one inside is not "real" :)

So, it was actually very handy to write my resolutions and go back to them along the year and see what I have or have not done...and what was stopping me.  Sometimes, I would find that I have changed plans, which was OK, assuming that I was not "cheating". And, I did achieve many of the resolutions or objectives of the last couple of years; I lost those extra pounds and started exercising (I did get them back and stopped exercising, which is an objective that persists throughout 2014), I did publish my first book, after which this blog is named "The Yellow Raincoat" and so far it is doing very well, thank God. I did participate in the studies I wanted and I did both achieve and enjoy my work-related objectives and some of my family objectives too.

Whether these lists were inspiring or not, I am trying to remember.  I think they were inspiring the moment I wrote them. I can also recall that coming back to them sort of reminded me of what was important for me in a "sober" moment, without the daily rush.  They were committing in a way.

So, based on this very fruitful experience with resolutions, I knew it was time for my new year resolutions (just like the appraisals) and I took my new notepad ( I am an addict for notepads and mugs) and started thinking.  Then I thought "Let us not start right away with the resolutions...let us start from where wishes reside...my heart".  What started it was hearing myself saying loudly "I wanna be able to go home early and have a cup of tea with a book in bed".  It was an easy and legitimate wish.  Why can't I have it in 2014?  Then I started the list with things that I WANT rather than WANT TO DO.  It was totally pure, to be honest, my endless "to do lists" kept meddling into my wish list but it was OK. 

Yesterday, I went back to this list to get inspired from the heart and start my resolutions.  Already 5 days were gone and I am very conscientious about the time that passes.  I started by reading what I WANT.... then I realized that I do NOT want to have a resolution list anymore.  Not this year, for sure.  I realized I was already on track of all that stuff.  I realized that one thing that I most wanted this new year was to feel leisure...freedom...space... I do not want to feel like I am carrying a head too tall due to the lists on top of it. 

I realized that the lists have added commitment and clarity to me before.  Now, they are too committing and they take the oxygen out of me.  At one point I used them to serve me. At one point they gave me something useful.  At this point, however, they are negatively influencing me...they are taking out the pleasure of the objectives by the suffocating commitment I associate with them. 
I think my road is clear.  I know what I want to do.  I know also what I want more of.  And I know that this year, I do not need resolution lists.  Not that they are bad....but no, not this year, thanks :)

And so, my lesson out of this was that things change.  Some tools might be good for us at a certain point and bad for us at another. Even though they are the same tools and we are the same people.  My other learning was one that I already knew but saw with fresh eyes once again; it is how you approach things that really matter.  The same thing can be a pleasure or a pain.  It depends how you call it and see it. Is it a task, an objective, a mission, a purpose, a hobby, a job, an activity... and what are the feelings you associate with each one of those...

So, this year, I am interested in following my dreams... in butterfly-like steps...leisurely and with pleasure...Happy new year!